This Is Exactly Why I No Longer Watch Music Videos

Keri Hilson's new video The Way You Love Me was "mysteriously" leaked online this week (yeah I'm not buying that either). This video is just simply too much. At the beginning, Keri introduces the female celeb cameos (which include JoJo, Faith Evans, and Dawn Richards) who all play some kind of gun carrying gangsters (and yes they all look as stupid as it sounds). Then we get to spend the rest of the video watching a scantily-clad Keri gyrate all over any and everything while making sexually explicit gestures with her hands. I guess the only thing that people know how to put into music videos these days is sex and violence. And people wonder why young girls today are so sexually immoral and lack self respect.

In case you haven't seen the video here it is.

Music Spotlight: Keke Palmer

Disney Channel star Keke Palmer recently released a video for her song The One You Call. The video (which she paid for herself) was kind of cute. I still can't believe this is the same girl from Akeelah and the Bee.

Anyway, it's nice to see a young girl that is actually putting out positive images. I wonder why more young girls don't look up to girls like her rather than Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus.

For those of you who haven't seen the video here it is.

Tyra Strikes Again

Tyra Banks: high fashion model, runway diva, Emmy award winning talk show host, executive producer, and philanthropist. Just when you think Tyra has done it all, she does something new. Now Ms. Banks can officially add the title of director to her long list of accomplishments. During last night's episode of America's Next Top Model, Tyra made her directorial debut when she shot a motion editorial featuring the four remaining girls. I was extremely impressed. The reverse hair flipping was hot! It was a little dark for my taste, but overall I thought it worked.

Here it is in case you missed it.

Hit or Miss: Katy Perry

Katy Perry made an appearance at Nordstrom in NYC today for the release of her new perfume Purr. When I first saw her in this Zac Posen dress, I loved it, but the picture I saw was taken from the waist up. Once I saw the whole dress, I wasn't really a fan of the bottom. However, overall, I still think she looks stunning.

What do you guys think? Is this a hit or a miss?

Why Is Bristol Palin Even on DWTS?

The show is called Dancing with the Stars so why is Bristol on it? Is she actually a "star" now? At the beginning of the season she was introduced as a motivational speaker. I wasn't aware that she had a career at all.

I actually felt kind of sorry for Bristol. Her dancing was absolutely terrible! I was hoping for her sake that she could get at least one good dance during the season just to spare herself the humiliation. But she was never anywhere near good enough to be in the finals.

In response to the other dancers, mainly Maks (Brandy's partner), questioning how she was able to remain in the competition given the fact that she can't dance, her response was "The show is all about taking someone who has never performed, never danced and turning them into a dancer. I guarantee that I am the most improved. I really do work my butt off".

Ok first off the show doesn't take people who have never performed. Maybe they've never danced professionally but they have all performed somewhere before. Except for you Bristol, which is why I ask again, why were you on the show?

Second even if the show were about turning someone into a dancer, does she really think that's what happened to her? Anybody can learn choreography but you can't teach rhythm. Sorry dear, you are by no means a dancer.

Third, the person who wins shouldn't get it for being most improved. It should be because they were the best dancer. And she simply was not. Even Florence Henderson was much better than her and she was in her 70s.

And most importantly, this is a dancing show. It's not about transforming people, or giving them a platform to be a voice for unwed teen moms. Either you can dance or you can't. That's all the show should be about. Who you are, or in this case who you know, has nothing to do with your ability to dance. I'm sure Bristol is a nice person, but she is not a dancer and this is a dance competition.

Unfortunately Brandy was robbed. But at least she still has her career. Hopefully we'll be hearing some new music from her soon.

Brandy Eliminated from DWTS

Brandy was sent home from Dancing with the Stars tonight after receiving a perfect score from the judges for her Argentine Tango Monday night. She was definitely deserving of a spot in the final 3 and I am shocked that she was sent home. This is the exact reason why I normally don't watch shows like this. It is not about talent. It's just a popularity contest. Smh.

Michael Ealy Responds to the Criticism of For Colored Girls

Here is a response that actor Michael Ealy gave to essence.com concerning the complaints surrounding the negative portrayal of black men in For Colored Girls.

"I think that if you say this is male bashing, you're not looking at the bigger picture. Yeah there are some men with problems in the piece and if you did notice, yes, Hill Harper is one good man. But this is a play by women, by a woman. And it's not like Tyler [Perry] or anyone else wrote the script that had all these men with problems. In my opinion the bigger picture is that the issues that were applicable in the mid '70s when the play was on Broadway, are still plaguing our women and our children right now. The bigger issue is that the piece is timeless. And if you're a man who is handling your business then you know this doesn't apply to you. This isn't a film that showcases men; this is a film that showcases the triumph of our women."

I couldn't have said it better myself.

Jessica Simpson Waleo Pump

About two months ago I showed you guys a pair of Jessica Simspon Waleo pumps on my shopping wish list and I finally gave in and just bought them. It took me a little while to find these shoes in my size and I eventually found them on piperlime.com.

The natural color isn't a nude (which is how it looks online). It's kind of a beige, mustardy color. Here are a couple of pics.

GOP Is The New Black?

I have to be honest, law school has been kicking my butt this semester. I am working on two real life cases and once I finally drag myself out of clinic, all I have time to do is come home, eat, and go to bed. So unfortunately, I have not been following the news as much as I usually do. However recently this story caught my eye.

I read an article posted by Mary Benton describing her reaction when she first saw the "GOP is the New Black" billboard in Texas (you can read it here). She says that she was lucky that the billboard didn't cause her to have a fender bender. To be honest, her post really didn't alarm me, but I was surprised by many of the comments left on her blog. It wasn't until then that I realized that a lot of African Americans were personally offended by this billboard. One of my friends on her facebook page even stated how disgusted she was that this billboard was going up in her home town. Disgusted? Really?

I am really confused as to why everyone is up in arms about this. I admit, I do consider myself to be a moderate conservative but that DOES NOT mean that I vote on solely partisan grounds in elections. Surprisingly, I actually take the time to read about the candidates before I vote. But I guess that's just too much work for some people...

Anyway, back to the topic. It's a campaign season. Both parties are interested in getting their people elected. How many political commercials have you had to sit through prior to this most recent election? So if we know that politicians are willing to put in a lot of extra work to get another vote, why is this so shocking?

Was it shocking that the GOP was actually going after the "black vote"? Or was it offensive to people that there are African American people who consider themselves to be part of the GOP? This is an honest question because I really don't know.

I have often been the victim of eye rolling, disrespect, rude comments, and exclusion whenever I mention my support for a GOP politician. I'm black, I'm from the South, I grew up in a single parent home, how can I support a party that has done nothing for me? Well if you feel the GOP can and has done nothing for you, then you are right to vote for someone else. However I take the time to read and educate myself prior to casting a vote. And I'm sorry, it's going to take a lot more than a politician identifying him or herself as a Democrat for them to get my vote!

Did you guys see this billboard? Have you heard others talking about it? What is the big deal?

Shopping Wish List: Shoes!

Why can't shoes be free?!?! Here are some of the shoes I am totally crushing on right now.

Report "Juniper" currently retailed at $115

Harajuku Lovers "Avallon" retailed at $94.95

Betsey Johnson "Caeley" retailed at $175

Naughty Monkey "Shock and Awe 2" retailed at $93.95

Paris Hilton "Reznor" in pewter retailed at $98.95

Odd Girl Out?

This is slightly different than the type of posts I usually do but I really wanted to write this because this issue has been bugging me for a while now. Have any of you ever experienced being the odd man out? For me, I feel like it happens all the time. I have a very small group of friends 1) because I really don't trust a lot of people and 2) I think that true friendships are rare and most people I "hang out" with I don't really consider my friends. Well anyway, the people I do consider my "friends" leave me out of just about everything. They are always going out with each other and never inviting me. When I talk, they cut me off or change the topic as if what I have to say isn't important. One of them even stood me up on my birthday because the rain was giving her a headache. She then called me that same night and kept me on the phone for over 2 hours so she could talk to me about a guy she likes. So much for being sick. It was so frustrating!

I have been blessed with a twin sister and it's really nice to have someone that you can always depend on. However we now live in two different states so we can't be as much a part of each others lives as we want. So I feel kind of forced to put some effort into finding and maintaining some really good friendships.

A part of me sometimes wonders if my feelings are a bit irrational. Of course things can't be about me all the time, or even most of the time. But shouldn't they be every once in a while? It's just difficult to always be the one that everyone calls when they have a bad day, or when they need notes from class, or when they want to talk about their relationships, etc. But when I have a problem, none of them are ever available. I don't think a single one of them has ever even asked me how I am doing, but that of course would take the spotlight off of them and their problems.

What do you guys think? Am I being a bit irrational? I really do love them, it's just hard to always be the one who has to give but never receives...

God's Love Is Greater Than We Can Even Imagine!

I saw this on FathersLoveLetter.com and really wanted to share it. If you ever find yourself doubting God's love for you, simply read this and you will be reminded that His love goes so much deeper than either you or I's own capacity to love. There is truly no one who will ever love you more than Him.

My Child,

You may not know me,
but I know everything about you.
Psalm 139:1

I know when you sit down and when you rise up.
Psalm 139:2

I am familiar with all your ways.
Psalm 139:3

Even the very hairs on your head are numbered.
Matthew 10:29-31

For you were made in my image.
Genesis 1:27

In me you live and move and have your being.
Acts 17:28

For you are my offspring.
Acts 17:28

I knew you even before you were conceived.
Jeremiah 1:4-5

I chose you when I planned creation.
Ephesians 1:11-12

You were not a mistake,
for all your days are written in my book.
Psalm 139:15-16

I determined the exact time of your birth
and where you would live.
Acts 17:26

You are fearfully and wonderfully made.
Psalm 139:14

I knit you together in your mother's womb.
Psalm 139:13

And brought you forth on the day you were born.
Psalm 71:6

I have been misrepresented
by those who don't know me.
John 8:41-44

I am not distant and angry,
but am the complete expression of love.
1 John 4:16

And it is my desire to lavish my love on you.
1 John 3:1

Simply because you are my child
and I am your Father.
1 John 3:1

I offer you more than your earthly father ever could.
Matthew 7:11

For I am the perfect father.
Matthew 5:48

Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand.
James 1:17

For I am your provider and I meet all your needs.
Matthew 6:31-33

My plan for your future has always been filled with hope.
Jeremiah 29:11

Because I love you with an everlasting love.
Jeremiah 31:3

My thoughts toward you are countless
as the sand on the seashore.
Psalms 139:17-18

And I rejoice over you with singing.
Zephaniah 3:17

I will never stop doing good to you.
Jeremiah 32:40

For you are my treasured possession.
Exodus 19:5

I desire to establish you
with all my heart and all my soul.
Jeremiah 32:41

And I want to show you great and marvelous things.
Jeremiah 33:3

If you seek me with all your heart,
you will find me.
Deuteronomy 4:29

Delight in me and I will give you
the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:4

For it is I who gave you those desires.
Philippians 2:13

I am able to do more for you
than you could possibly imagine.
Ephesians 3:20

For I am your greatest encourager.
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

I am also the Father who comforts you
in all your troubles.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4

When you are brokenhearted,
I am close to you.
Psalm 34:18

As a shepherd carries a lamb,
I have carried you close to my heart.
Isaiah 40:11

One day I will wipe away
every tear from your eyes.
Revelation 21:3-4

And I'll take away all the pain
you have suffered on this earth.
Revelation 21:3-4

I am your Father, and I love you
even as I love my son, Jesus.
John 17:23

For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed.
John 17:26

He is the exact representation of my being.
Hebrews 1:3

He came to demonstrate that I am for you,
not against you.
Romans 8:31

And to tell you that I am not counting your sins.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled.
2 Corinthians 5:18-19

His death was the ultimate expression
of my love for you.
1 John 4:10

I gave up everything I loved
that I might gain your love.
Romans 8:31-32

If you receive the gift of my son Jesus,
you receive me.
1 John 2:23

And nothing will ever separate you
from my love again.
Romans 8:38-39

Come home and I'll throw the biggest party
heaven has ever seen.
Luke 15:7

I have always been Father,
and will always be Father.
Ephesians 3:14-15

My question is…
Will you be my child?
John 1:12-13

I am waiting for you.
Luke 15:11-32

Love,

Your Dad, Almighty God

Father's Love Letter used by permission Father Heart Communications
© 1999-2010 www.FathersLoveLetter.com

For Colored Girls Is NOT Anti Black Men

I know I've already done a post about For Colored Girls but I just had to respond to the constant complaints I have heard saying that this movie was just another attempt by Tyler Perry to make black men look bad. Number one, maybe some people should actually pick up a copy of the play and read it (I mean it really is not that long my copy is like 80 pages). If they did they would know that this story was NOT written by Tyler Perry.

Secondly, if you walked away from the movie thinking that the message was "black men ain't worth nothing" then clearly you were not paying attention. To me the movie was clearly about women in general (not just black women) and the struggles that we all go through with men. But like Phylicia Rashad's character says to Kimberly Elise towards the end, we women have to take personal responsibility for the role we played in our own situation. There are bad men out there, clearly. And unfortunately many of us women go through experiences with men that we don't have to because we choose to ignore what is right there in front of us. The Lady in Green knew her man kept cheating and walking out and she still kept taking him back. The Lady in Red knew her man was on the down low, and continued to love him, as she said, on purpose. The message behind this film is not one of man bashing, but clearly about women "becoming themselves" by recognizing who they are which in turn causes them to not settle for anything less than they deserve.

Further, the cast was all black because that is how the play was written. But it could have just as easily been white men in those situations, or hispanic men, or Asian men (you get my point). I went to the movies to see this with girls that were not black and even they could relate to the film. I think everyone complaining that this movie is a bash on black men is just looking for something to complain about. If you couldn't look past the color of these men and just see them as bad men who happened to be black, then you probably have some other race issues that you really need to deal with.

For all the men that hate this being the story of so many women, then change your behavior! Oh but wait, it's much easier to insult Tyler Perry than it is to look at yourself in the mirror and take personal responsibility for all the women you have personally abused over the years. Maybe instead of making insults you need to ask yourself why you felt you were personally reflected in the bad male characters as opposed to the one really good one...

Wayne Brady's For Colored Girls Trailer

Hilarious!

For (Stuffed) Colored Girls from Wayne Brady

For Colored Girls Movie Review

I went to see For Colored Girls last night and all I can say is wow wow wow! It was amazing! I have read all the negative reviews this film has been getting so I really didn't have high hopes. I was also somewhat worried about there being too many big stars in one film, but here it actually worked.

Because I was unfortunately on CP time, I missed the first 10 minutes of the movie. However the acting is some of the best I have seen on film in a long time. The scene where Anika Noni Rose is in the hospital describing her rape to Hill Harper is powerful. And Loretta Devine's monologue towards the end was so real and relatable. It was just simply amazing.

I have read the book so I do know that some of the dialogue was taken directly from its pages. There were a few scenes where this just really did not work but it did not take away from my experience. I think even if you haven't read the book, it will be easy to tell what parts I am talking about. The only reason I am hesitant to say that Tyler Perry should not have used them at all is because a few of them really worked in the film.

All of the actresses did an amazing job and demonstrated the high level of talent they each possess. This is the best I have ever seen Thandie Newton and her performance was my absolute favorite (well it's more of a tie between her and Loretta Devine). Whoopi Goldberg, Phylicia Rashad, and Loretta Devine are already legends even though they have never received the recognition they deserve. If none of these women receive any recognition for these award worthy performances it will be highway robbery! And yes, that includes Ms. Jackson!

Ignore all of the negative reviews and go see this film! It is a definite must see for everyone, not just us colored girls.

Start Demanding the Respect You Deserve!

Last night, I was walking home when I passed a couple holding hands. They looked to be in their teens and were engaged in a very loud conversation. I have no idea what they were talking about but when I got closer to them I heard the guy say to the girl "I don't care because you are a freaking whore anyway". And what was the girls response? She simply laughed and said "I'm not a whore" and continued to hold his hand as they walked down the street arguing.

I was so digusted after seeing this. I am in no way passing judgment. I was in a verbally abusive relationship myself for 3 years and my mom was physically abused for a decade so I really do understand that it is not easy for women to walk away from abuse. But what really upset me was that the girl didn't even seem to know that what her boyfriend was saying to her was abuse.

I think back on my own relationship and the number of times I was called a b****, a whore, and every other disgusting name you could possibly imagine. I was cussed out daily, constantly put down, disrespected in public, and made to look like a fool in front of anyone who would listen. And when I did say you can't talk to me like that or you can't treat me this way, deep down what I really felt was this is only happening because I deserve it, if only I could be better this would stop.

And that, sadly, is the thinking of so many young girls today. It's painful for me to watch. When a guy calls a girl stupid, people laugh. When he tells her that her opinions or wants are stupid, she continues to hold his hand and act like nothing is happening. When he cusses her out and hangs up on her, she continues to call him back. When he talks badly about her in front of his friends, they all chime in and put her down too. When he talks badly about her in front of females, they all side with him putting down this poor girl without ever getting her side of the story. No one ever stops to think that something is wrong with this dude putting down the woman he claims to care about in public regardless of what she did.

This has all got to stop. But how? Can we stop abuse? Of course not, but we can fix ourselves first.

No one will give the respect you deserve unless you demand it. How do you demand it? When a guy disrespects you, stop entertaining him. You might think gee that's a little harsh but is it really? Do you really want to share the most intimate parts of yourself with someone who doesn't even care enough about you to address you by your name? Do you really want a man like that to be the father of your kids? Do you want to entrust your physical safety and well being to a man who treats you like dirt? If the answer is no, then simply don't do it! The next time that man hangs up on you, calls you a name, puts you down, embaresses you in public, makes a mockery of your feelings, or disrespects you in any way, move on to the next. Trust me, the longer you stay the worse it will get.

When I got tired of my ex using me as his punching bag, I stopped allowing him to treat me that way (I really should have left but I wasn't strong enough then). Did it make him change his behavior? No, but I changed mine. When he called me stupid I said ok, hung up the phone and went about my business. When he tried to scream at me I'd say you can call me back when you calm down until then I am not available. When I stopped entertaining his foolishness, he moved on. He left the relationship and was engaged to someone else a few months later.

A man does not have to hit you for you to be the victim of abuse. If a relationship is causing you pain, that is probably a sign. Just ask would you want this guy to be in a relationship with your best friend or your sister? If the answer is no, then why do you accept it for yourself? Remember, you deserve so much more and will never get it until you stop accepting anything less.