Summer TV Review: Plain Jane

Photo courtesy of Matt Kennedy and the CW All Rights Reserved

The CW has been advertising their new reality show Plain Jane for months now. I've been so excited to watch this show. When the previews started airing I hated that I would have to wait until the end of summer to watch a single episode. I am a firm believer that confidence in women is key! There are so many bad situations in my life that I could have avoided if I had more self esteem. True beauty does come from within but let's be honest, the outside package counts too.

My biggest problem with the show is that it is premised on the idea of catching a man. These girls are all on the show because they think they need to be "hotter" if they are going to have any chance of landing their dream guy. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be the best you possible and we women are all guilty of spending a few extra minutes in front of the mirror when there is a guy we like. However, I have a serious problem with the idea that these girls somehow need to change themselves to get a guy. If a guy that is your friend didn't notice you without 4 inch heels and a skin tight dress then you may need to find another guy. Creating a fake you to please a man is only going to bring you misery. Trust me I know.

At the end of the show, the newly transformed girl presents herself to the object of her affection and reveals her secret love for him. Waiting for the guy to recover from the shock and embarrassment is nothing short of awkward. And could you imagine if he said not interested. What would happen to that poor girl?

But the show was not all bad. At the end when this week's "plain jane" Cristen revealed her secret crush to her friend of 6 years, he told her that he had a crush on her since college and just never told her. See? He liked her exactly the way she was before all the hair and makeup. That to me was beautiful.

The show ended with pictures of the new couple and they seemed pretty happy together. Suprisingly Cristen looked like herself just with perfectly tweezed eyebrows and a chic new haircut. By the time the show went off I found myself thinking I was perhaps a bit too quick to make a negative judgment. Maybe they didn't try to change this girl but just tried to give her the tools to be a more improved happier version of herself. It definitely seemed to work.

I think I'll keep tuning in...

Plain Jane airs Wednesday nights at 9 EST on the CW.

Your Ex Is A Jerk? Ok, Now Move On!

So this afternoon I was watching an episode of the Tyra show with guests who claimed they suffered from sexorexia (in other words they no longer engaged in sexual activity of any kind as a punishment to themselves for some other issue). Well there was this dude on the show telling everyone how he hasn't had sex in 8 years because his ex-girlfriend disappeared for 5 days then came back and said she didn't want to be with him anymore--and it broke his heart. The ex was on the show and the guy was sitting on the couch crying and looking at her saying "you never even said sorry". Dude it's been 8 years. As if that's not bad enough, he proceeds to talk about how he lost his job, has no money, his car is falling apart and women don't want him because he doesn't have, in his words, "bling-bling". Well, sir, maybe if you focused your energy on working and building up your finances instead of walking around depressed about a relationship that ended 8 years ago you wouldn't be broke.

Ok, I don't mean to make light of his pain. We've all been there. There's an ex that completely abuses your trust and treats you in a way that no human being deserves to be treated and you are in more pain than you even knew was humanly possible. I don't know about you, but when I was in the situation it made me feel better to tell people how much of a jerk my ex was. But it wasn't so much out of hate for him. I wanted to make myself feel better about how much anger and pain I was feeling and I thought if I could get my friends and family to say he was a bad person then I could justify all the pain I was in.

Watching that guy showed me something though. We will all probably suffer some kind of betrayal at some point in our life. And it is great for friends and family to offer us their shoulder to cry on as we try to move on from those painful experiences. But the important thing is that we move on. I won't place any kind of time limit on moving on...it took me years to recover from my ex. But when it's been 8 years and you are still crying like it happened yesterday you haven't moved on. And though you may want the whole world to see how bad of a person your ex is the only thing you actually end up accomplishing is making yourself look crazy.

Lifetime Movies...Not What They Used to Be

I have been watching Lifetime since I was a little girl. I remember how my sister and I would spend our entire Saturday afternoon watching their movies. Then came Lifetime Movie Network and we thought we were in heaven! Lifetime movies all day, every day...what could be better?

Well....

That was then, this is now. Back then, Lifetime movies told stories of real women. Believable stories we could all relate to. They taught us about abuse, violence, drugs, eating disorders, love, lust and all the consequences that come with fast living. I must say that I learned quite a few lessons watching these movies as a teen. Now, every time I turn on Lifetime there's another movie on about some ghost terrorizing a town or 40 year old woman stalking some poor woman's husband or a girl who can see dead people (how original?) and quite frankly it is starting to get old.

Lifetime is not supposed to be about filth. Real stories, real women...that's their theme right? If I wanted to watch poorly executed brainless movies I would spend my time watching a Step Up marathon. But it is still Lifetime and I believe they can redeem themselves. We Were the Mulvaneys is still one of their best original movies ever and that came out in this decade. That means there's hope right?

This month Lifetime premiered The Client List starring Jennifer Love Hewitt. The story seemed right up their alley--a young mom struggling to make ends meet finds herself tangled up in a life of prostitution and is ultimately disgraced when all she was trying to do was support her family. I also love Jennifer Love Hewitt so I expected it to be a good movie. Needless to say I was disappointed. It was mediocre at best. How can it be that they have been telling these same stories for decades and still can't manage to get it right? It wasn't so much the actors as it was that the movie was just poorly written. And whoever the dialect coach was that taught those actors those cheesy southern accents needs to lose his or her job immediately. After an hour and a half I realized I was no longer paying attention to the movie and was instead looking at my TV thinking "Jennifer is such a beautiful girl. I wonder why she is in her 30s and still single. Oh no, will I be in my 30s and still single...". Needless to say those are not the kind of thoughts that are going to leave me feeling good about what I just watched.

But I still believe in you Lifetime and will patiently wait for your comeback.

Racism Has Got to End

Racism is sick. I grew up in the South so I am well aware of just how racist some people can be towards blacks...and yes this still goes on in 2010. I am also in a predominantly white profession. When I sit in my law classes, or walk into the offices of my internship, I am usually the only black face. Matter of fact, I'm usually the only person of color period. Every time my fellow interns get together and magically forget to invite me, or an employer lectures me about the importance of being on time and not turning in crappy work even when I have done nothing wrong, or a fellow intern looks in my face and has the nerve to tell me they like me because I am "not like normal black people", it hurts. I have spent years working hard to prove myself in a society that has considered me a failure from the beginning. Poor black southern girl from a single parent household...what will she ever accomplish? But by the grace of God I have accomplished.

There is nothing more demeaning or humiliating than when you experience racism. The first time someone ever calls you the n-word, it does something to you. But one thing I know, hate breeds hate. And I refuse to be a victim of racism. I will continue to pursue whatever path in life I choose to follow. And most importantly, I will not allow racists to win by making me hate!

Black people seem to have this opinion that blacks can't be racist...we've experienced too much oppression ourselves to ever be in that category. Well that is a huge lie! I have been honest here that I have a tiny obsession with blogs. Well today, I went on mediatakeout.com and one of their stories was that Essence magazine (which I love!) just hired a white woman as one of their main editors and that they would officially be cancelling their subscriptions. Now was there any evidence that Essence passed up on a more qualified black applicant to hire this woman? No. So why the anger? Oh I know, because of the color of her skin...

Essence isn't immune either. The other day I was reading an article on their website written by a black woman as she was contemplating whether or not she should consider dating men of other races. I am not a fan of that conversation (but that is a topic for another day). However, I was completely relating to everything she said until I got to the end of the article and she stated that she told her girlfriends one of the reasons why she didn't date white men is because "they just smell different". Excuse me? White people smell different?! If I ever overheard a group of white men sitting around talking about they couldn't date a black woman because we smell different I wouldn't hesitate to call them racist. And I am not going to hesitate with this woman. She took the time to write an article for a magazine. Proofread countless times. And yet still determined that was on ok statement to make. Something is wrong!

I am sick of racism. I am tired of the nasty comments and the snide looks. Racism hurts and I will never, I mean NEVER, make another human being feel the way I feel when it happens to me. Martin Luther King, Jr. dreamed of a world where people would be judged not by the color of their skin, but the content of their character. That didn't just apply to black people. When you judge a white person simply by their skin color, you are no different than the white racists you continue to fight against. Yes white people are the majority. Yes they are the ones in power. And yes racism towards them probably does not affect them even a fraction as much as it affects those of us in the black community. But wrong is wrong. When I walk into a room I want people to see me and form an opinion based on my actions. And I do the same towards everyone I meet regardless of their ethnicity because I am not a hypocrite.

Express Clearance Sale

Express is having an amazing clearance sale right now. Every clearance item is reduced an extra 20% at checkout on top of the already amazing prices. Various styles of their popular editor pant are on clearance for just $23 (they are originally retailed for 60 bucks) . There are a lot of great deals so check it out today. They are selling out fast.

Bargain Tip: If you have never signed up for their email list, do so on the website and you will get a coupon for 15% off your online purchase.

Happy shopping!

Music Spotlight: Laura Izibor

I recently discovered Atlantic Records recording artist Laura Izibor while watching a reality show on VH1. I absolutely love her voice. There is so much passion and intensity behind each of her songs. This is the kind of music you feel down in your soul. Her sound is uniquely hers (think neo-soul mixed with a bit of Norah Jones). Any person that has ever loved and had their heart broken is sure to find a song that resonates with them. And if you are fourtunate enough to have never experienced a broken heart you will still find a song that you'll fall in love with (if not all of them). Anyone that enjoys good music will want to hear this album.

You can purchase your copy of her debut album Let the Truth Be Told on iTunes, amazon.com, or at record stores nationwide. Some of her songs are also avaliable on youtube if you want a bit of a preview before you buy the album.

Here's a video of my favorite single. What's your favorite?

Nice Girls Marry Last?

As a child I was always told there were two types of girls: the ones guys wanted to marry and the ones they wanted to sleep with and if you fell into the latter category your reputation was ruined and no guy would publicly admit to wanting to be with you.

Things are a lot different than when I was a teenage girl. I remember when Britney Spears first came out, everyone made a big deal about her claim that she was a virgin and many were outright offended when they found out that was no longer the case. Christina Aguilera caused a stir when she made her video for "Dirty" because she was wearing a red corset, hot pants, a bra top and chaps all while dancing provocatively. R&B singer Brandy had a child with her then boyfriend and put on a sham marriage for years (there was even a reality show documenting the lie) all in an attempt to protect her "good girl" image--God forbid the world know she got knocked up. I could go on and on...

These days are different. Morality is no longer praised. The Jonas Brothers are mocked for their decision to remain chaste. Kim Khardasian has managed to make a career off of a sex tape and the world seems to adore her for it. No longer are intimate moments shared between a couple kept between that couple to be treasured and valued. It used to be your body wasn't something you revealed to just anyone. Now teenage girls (and some grown women) are posting pictures in their bra and panties on social networking sites and sleeping with anything that calls them cute.

So why the change? Most guys say they want a "good girl" to raise their kids and set a positive example for their daughters. But then you look at the media and see Kanye West flaunting a stripper as his girlfriend, countless R&B singers entering relationships with video girls, and athletes actually marrying their groupies. You would expect that to be characteristic of men that aren't believers, but now men in the church are doing it too!

So then I'm left to wonder, where do the nice girls fit in?

I know lots of nice girls that are single. Good, honest, hard working women that can't get a man. And I know plenty of not so nice ones that are not. Then I start to think, is a nice girl's lack of "experience" now a negative that makes her unappealing to men still in their 20s and not ready to give up the bachelor lifestyle to commit to a long term relationship? Well maybe. But what does it matter. Would you really want to marry the type of guy that would sleep around with any kind of woman anyway. I'm not going to wait for some guy in his mid 30s who finally wants to settle down, marry the nice girl, and have a family after he's bedded everything that even looked at him in his 20s. I don't want every woman's sloppy seconds.

Do nice girls marry last? I'm not sure. But one thing is certain. You don't have to resort to taking provocative pictures and walking around practically naked in public to get a man. Be yourself and maintain your purity. And even if you marry later than everyone else, at least you'll know that it is to a man that respects himself enough not to violate his body by sleeping with any random woman and that he has enough respect for women not to take advantage of their low self esteem. You'll know that he's with you not just for your body, but also your mind and soul. And most of all you'll know he is moral and a man of God by more than just words.

That to me is worth the wait!

N.Y.C Nail Polish Glitzy Grape Glitter Review

I love experimenting with my nails and trying new bold, bright colors. But I am an aspiring attorney and a lot of the colors I love are not really appropriate in a conservative office environment. So I've been on a quest to find colors that are still fun but work-appropriate.

I was in Target and came across this N.Y.C. polish. Normally I walk past the collection of N.Y.C. polishes because I've heard other people say that the colors never look as good on as they do in the bottle. But since it was under $1.00 I figured I could justify buying a color that I may never wear again.

I chose the Glitzy Grape because it had a slight touch of color but was still conservative enough to wear to work without offending anyone. Well to my surprise I actually fell in love with the color!

I had to apply 3 coats in order for the color to be as bright as it is in the bottle and even after that the color was still a little bit sheer. But this polish dries super fast so it makes having to apply so many coats a little less painful. I also don't know why it is classified as a long-wear enamel because after 2 days of wear my polish was already chipping. But I paid like .97 cents for it so what do you expect.

If you buy this polish you probably will have to touch your nails up quite often. But since I am experimenting with colors, the cheaper the polish the more colors I can try so it works for me.

Confessions of A Shoe Addict?

Bossip is running a story today about R&B singer Ciara. Now first let me say, I know Ciara gets a lot of hate from the media and the public. I however am not a Ciara hater. Is she the most talented person in the world? Not even close. But she is beautiful and thanks to Missy and Jazzy Pha she at one time had some decent hits. Speaking of which, maybe she needs to find their number so they can save her career because The Dream is not working for her.

So anyway Bossip says that Ciara in a Parade Magazine interview claimed to spend $11,000/month on shoes. Now I don't read Parade so I didn't see the story myself. But if that is true all I can say is girl what are you thinking?? I love shoes just as much as the next girl and if I had her bank account, I could probably do some serious damage myself. But every month?

If you tune in to one of the shows that tell the "untold stories" behind celebs (like Behind the Music or E! True Hollywood Story) I guarantee you will see this: a celeb who at one time was on the top of the industry then fast forward 10 years and they are bankrupt, getting evicted from their home, struggling to pay their bills and crying about how they lost it all. Well when I see that I think "what in the world happened to all the money you were making". Should someone who ever had an income of hundreds of thousands of dollars a year ever go bankrupt? Not if they know how to manage their money. Very few celebs have the talent or charisma to keep the public interested in them for a long period of time. For everyone else, there will come a day when the public no longer buys their albums or goes to see their movies and no one will be interested in what you had for lunch much less what you wear on your feet. And when you weren't even an A list celeb to begin with, that day might be coming sooner than you think...

All I can say is Ciara, take your pennies and stow them away for a rainy day. You never know when you might need them.

You can check out the story here.

Style Icon:Kerry Washington

If I could steal anyone's wardrobe, Kerry Washington would be at the top of my list. She always looks absolutely AMAZING. Perfect hair, perfect shoes, perfect makeup, just perfect everything. Of course the only place I would have to wear one of her glamorous gowns would be around my apartment but a girl can dream.

Here are a few of my favorite looks from Ms. Kerry.

Kerry at the 23rd Annual Cinematheque Awards

Here's Kerry in April at the LA premeire of Mother and Child

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Kerry at the 2007 VH1 Hip Hop Honors

My Summer TV Review: Downtown Girls

It's summertime and you know what that means....trashy summer TV. I watch way more TV than I probably should. Usually I will watch almost anything at least once only to find myself thinking less about what I'm watching and more about the chunk of my life that I can never get back. But, every once in a while, I find a show that keeps me coming back. Not because it is the best TV has to offer but just simply because I, in my own weird way, find it "entertaining". There are a number of shows that have me hooked this summer but today is all about Downtown Girls.

Downtown Girls is a reality show on MTV that follows 5 friends as they navigate their way through life in NYC. When I first saw the preview for this show I thought "great another crappy knockoff of the Hills--as if one wasn't bad enough". But like I said, no matter how much I think I am going to hate a show, I always find myself watching at least one episode.

The 5 girls are each extremely different. It's amazing to me that they are all friends. There's Shallon, a Carrie-esque contributor for Glamour magazine and the most sane one of the group. Then there's Gurj who doesn't get that much screen time--all I know is she is totally obsessed with her rocker boyfriend to the point that she has violated one of the ultimate girl rules: Never diss your girlfriends for a guy! Nikki is struggling to maintain the boutique she owns in the city, has a little bit of a shopping addiction and is on the hunt for Mr. Right (aren't we all). Klo is the dull one of the bunch. She is engaged to be married and doesn't work so I guess there really isn't much about her to tell. And then there is Victoria, an aspiring lawyer who failed the bar twice but still manages to have time to go out regularly. I don't know what law school she went to and managed to have free time. I'm no career advisor but I'm pretty sure that going on a reality TV show that portrays you as immature and simple-minded isn't the best way to start your career. Anyway I digress...

I know this is just another pointless reality TV show but isn't it ok to watch bad TV sometimes? No I don't learn any lessons watching this show and I won't shed a single tear when it goes off air. To be honest, I find all of the girls to be annoying with the exception of Shallon. I guess I watch because I find pleasure in knowing that I'm not the only girl in my 20s struggling to find her niche in a world she doesn't quite fit into and messing up every step of the way...

Downtown Girls airs Tuesday nights at 11 EST on MTV. You can check out full episodes of the show at mtv.com.

Welcome!

So since this is officially my first post I guess I should introduce myself. I am in my mid 20s and getting ready to embark on a brand new career as a lawyer (what was I thinking?). Most important, I am Christian who makes God number one in my life. For any other ladies that are in the same situation, then I don't have to explain to you how hard it is to meet a guy when you are committed to your faith, but that is a story for another day!

So what exactly is meant by my title "little black chic.tionary". Well basically it is my little book of secrets--my innermost thoughts, biggest fears, secret obsessions and everything in between. So drop by for everything from my fashion tips, faith lessons and stories about my hilarious and sometimes embarrassing adventures as I try to navigate my way into a new career.

Your 20s are supposed to be the best time of your life right? I guess we'll see...