Soon to be Esquire

So I have been away for a little while. Things have been crazy as I am starting my last year of law school (Praise God!). It's amazing how fast time can fly. Hopefully I'll still be able to post regularly.

God Why Am I Still Single?

When I hear Christian women ask this question, a woman (who is usually married) will respond by saying "God will send you a husband when you are ready" or "marriage isn't that good anyway be happy you are single". Neither of those responses offers any encouragement to the single Christian woman who desires to be married and still has not met "the one".

I was watching an episode of TLCs Say Yes to the Dress a few weeks ago and one of the bride's featured was a 27 year old woman looking for a dress for her second wedding. I remember thinking wow, she's 27 and has already met two men she wanted to marry...I haven't even met one. It doesn't help that every time I log onto my facebook account, another one of my classmates is either engaged, married or getting ready to have a baby.

I think as a Christian I often feel that if I pray for something and don't get it, it must be because I am doing something wrong or I'm not holy enough. Well I don't think that is the answer. If God's blessings were dependant on my perfection I would never receive anything!

Yes I am a Christian but I am still a human being. And though the most important thing to me is that I marry a godly man, I also want to marry a man that I am attracted to and that I love. The attitude for a lot of Christians seems to be that the only thing that matters is that a man is a believer. So when Joe walks up to you after church and expresses interest, the fact that you are not attracted to him should not be relevant. After all how many good single Christian men are you going to meet? I firmly disagree with that. Women who aren't believers won't go out with everyone who asks them. Why should I? And it doesn't help when books by authors such as Joshua Harris are presented to young Christian girls as the absolute truth when it is nothing more than one man's experience.

The fact is that sometimes a man can possess a lot of good qualities and still not be the one for you. Sometimes the fear of never meeting someone else with those good qualities causes us to enter into unfulfilling relationships. After spending years in an unhappy relationship I can say that without a doubt, every day that I spent alone is better than any day I spent with a man who was not the one for me.

Whenever I start to get discouraged I reflect on Proverbs 10:22 which says the blessings of the Lord maketh rich and addeth no sorrow. When you receive something from the Lord it is only supposed be a positive contribution to your life not bring you pain and misery. James 1:17 says every good and perfect gift comes from the Lord. If something is not good, it is not from Him.

I refuse to settle for someone who is not for me and if that means that I'll be single longer than any of my friends then that's just the way it is going to be.

An Example of Why You Should Think Before You Speak

The media has been buzzing about famed talk radio host Dr. Laura Schlessinger and her use of the N-word during a phone conversation with a black caller. The woman called in to Dr. Laura to express her frustration with her white husband's friends and family and their insensitivity towards her race.

What was Dr. Laura's advice to her? Black people are too hyper-sensitive about racism. I will admit, there are times when things are blown out of proportion. But that is not always the case. I am just curious as to how this woman who has never experienced what it is like to be black can say with complete confidence that this woman is too sensitive about her race. Then as if she hadn't already made her point, she goes on to say black people use the n-word with each other all the time and then said the word 6 different times. When the caller expressed her anger with Dr. Laura's use of the word, she repeated it, told her not to get all NAACP on her and then hung up. Don't get all NAACP?!?! How can a well educated, intelligent woman possibly think a comment like that is ok in any situation?

During the call she repeatedly referenced Obama in the White House and how black people put him there because he is black and that we now complain about racism more than we did before a black man was president. Dr. Laura is ignorant. The fact that Obama is black is not why he was elected president. Just ask Jesse Jackson how successful his presidential run was and last time I checked he is black. Obama is not president because black people voted for him. He is our president because AMERICANS voted for him. That may frustrate her but it is a fact.

Dr. Laura repeatedly said during the call that she didn't understand. That's the only thing she was right about. She doesn't understand. The reality is that she is a white woman. And because she is white she can never fully comprehend or understand what it is like to live in this country as a black woman.

So in the future, Dr. Laura, maybe you should only speak on areas where you possess some personal knowledge or understanding and leave the things that you clearly don't get to someone else.

Music Spotlight: Locke

Back when I was on myspace, my inbox was constantly flooded with messages from amateur artists trying to promote their music. Some of it was ok, most of it was not. But every once in a while I would find an artist that I thought was just as good if not better than most of the mainstream artists out now.

Meet Locke. They are an R&B trio based in California. Apparently they were on BET's 106 and Park earlier this year but I don't really watch the show anymore. I was on a friend's myspace page and I kept hearing She Don't Know playing in the background. I looked all over her page trying to find out who was singing the song but I didn't see a music player. Then I tried to google the lyrics and the song didn't come up. Finally I went back on her myspace page and found a link to Locke's myspace page in her comments. I was shocked when I realized that the song was by an amateur artist.

I love She Don't Know but they have some other good songs on their myspace page. You can check it out here.

Take a listen to my favorite single. Hopefully you'll like it as much as I do. Enjoy!

Movie Review: Dear John

I know I'm really late seeing this movie. I didn't want to go to the theater to see it alone and when it came out on DVD I refused to pay $20 for it. Nicholas Sparks' films can be somewhat disappointing and most of them are stories too sad for you to watch over and over again. Plus did anyone see GI Joe? That movie was painful to watch. Let's just say I didn't have high hopes for Channing Tatum.

Last weekend my sister and I finally sat down and watched the movie and I was suprisingly impressed. I love a good love story which is why I wanted so badly to see it, but I was expecting it to be cheesy and boring. Channing Tatum is impressive in this film. Granted he still isn't the world's best actor, but it is a big improvement from some of his earlier films. One thing he did was succeed in making you fall in love with his character. Lets just say in all my summers in South Carolina I never saw a man like him and if I had maybe I wouldn't be single!

Anyway this is a great story. The ending is kind of expected but I enjoyed getting there. I might actually go out and spend the $20 to buy it now.

If you haven't seen it yet, check out the trailer.

After Law School: Life on The Hill?

Anyone who knows me knows that I secretly dream of someday working on the Hill (yes Capitol Hill). It's not a fantasy because it is completely unattainable but because it seems a little unrealistic for me. First, I don't have any kind of connection to anyone in DC and we all know politics is more who you know than what you know. Also if I took an entry level position, say for example a job as a Congressional staffer, I would probably not be making anywhere near enough money to be able to afford to live in DC while paying back my student loans. At one point I was seriously considering applying to be an attorney for either the House or Senate Legislative Offices then I discovered that you can't work for either of them if you've ever worked for a political party and of course, I have. Guess they take that non-partisan thing seriously.

A part of me knows that if I really wanted to be on the Hill, I would find a way to make it happen. The truth is I've been away from home for 2 years now and I desperately miss my family. DC would only be about 4 hours from home which is much better than my current 14 hour distance but I would still be away from everyone and basically on my own. I'm also worried about getting caught up in the DC lifestyle. I don't want to wake up at 40 and realize I spent my life chasing a career at the expense of having a family. But I love politics. I went to law school to make a difference however corny that may sound. I'm the girl use to dream about the day I would get to testify at a Senate Committee Hearing. Now I'm not sure what I want.

There are so many decisions I have to make in this last year of school. I'm so worried about making the wrong one. Maybe one day I'll face my fear, conquer living in DC and pursue my dream job. But for now, I'll keep planning on moving back home. And who knows. Maybe I'll find another dream.

Must Have Product: China Glaze Fast Forward Top Coat

I recently discovered China Glaze's fast forward top coat which promises to quickly dry nails while providing shine. I applied it to wet nail polish and it went on smoothly without smearing my polish. Less than a minute later, my nails were almost completely dry. By two minutes I could run my fingers over the polish without smudging it. This is a product that really does what it promises. If you add this product to your collection you won't have to spend forever waiting for your nails to dry ever again. It is an absolute must have product. You can purchase this and other China Glaze products at Sally's Beauty Supply stores nationwide.

My Shopping Wish List

I have a problem...I love to shop! Whenever I go out I find something that I must have and if I leave it in the store, I'll go home and dream about it until I go back and buy it (sad I know). Well in reality I am still a student and since I will be finishing school soon, a large portion of my income will be going into paying back student loans not to mention car payments, rent, groceries and other necessities. So I am training myself to seriously reduce my spending and realize that I don't have to buy something I like as soon as I see it. In the interest of sticking to this new plan, I'm starting a shopping wish list that will include items that I would love to buy if not for their steep price tags (and some of them just may end up in my closet). Here are some of the items I'm crushing on right now. Just click on any title for a link to where you can purchase the item.

Jessica Simpson Waleo Pump

I saw this shoe in Macy's and I fell in love! I have narrow heels and no arch so it is hard for me to find shoes that don't slip off the back of my feet. I find that Jessica Simpson's shoes are one of the only brands that fit my feet perfectly. Plus every girl should own a pair of tan or nude pumps. These pumps currently retail for about $89.

Guess Old School Drawstring Bag

I absolutely love this bag! The only reason why I haven't purchased it is because I believe the colors are more appropriate for Spring. Since it is almost Fall, this bag would sit in my closet for like 8 months before I finally got a chance to wear it. But then again, for $95 I would probably wear it whenever I want.

Versace VE4 182 Sunglasses in Purple

I was in Macy's at the Sunglass Hut just looking and not expecting to find anything when I saw these sunglasses. They first caught my eye because they are purple (which is my favorite color). The are so chic and look even better in person. Now to come up with a way to afford the $220 price tag...

Bargain Find: Spring Shoes

Love Aldo shoes but can't always afford the price tag? Well let me introduce you to Spring shoes. This company is ran by the same people who are behind Aldo. Many of the styles sold on their website are very similar if not identical to the more expensive shoes sold on Aldo. A faboulous pair of shoes from a quality company for under 100 bucks...and every item ships for free! You can check out their website here.


Here are some of the items available on their website now. Be sure to check back often since new styles are added every week.

Currently on sale for $17.98


On sale for $19.98

New arrival sold for $49.99

Style Icon: Victoria Beckham

Victoria Beckham is style. Period. Regardless as to whether or not you would personally rock some of her looks you can't deny, she never steps outside looking anything short of amazing. She even wears 4 inch heels to buy groceries and walk with her kids. This is a woman who truly understands her body and knows what works for her. Plus she has her gorgeous husband to add a little extra spice to any look. If you haven't checked out her clothing line you should do so. Most of her pieces are moderately priced. Asos.com also carries a few pieces from her collection and a wide selection of dresses inspired by Mrs. Beckham.

Here are just a few of my favorite looks from her...

Support Christian Education

Hey guys!

For all of my readers that have facebook accounts, please take a minute to vote for my high school alma mater in the Kohl's cares competition. Just click here. Each person gets 20 votes and you can use 5 max. on any one school. Thanks in advance!

My Fall TV Must See List

I'm so excited to check out the Fall TV lineup. Here are some of the shows I plan to watch (at least once) in no particular order.

1. Desperate Housewives


Ok so this isn't technically a new show but after the theatrics that was the death of Eddie Britt I finally gave up on this show. But now that Vanessa Williams is joining the cast I am excited to check back in on Wisteria Lane. I absolutely love Ms. Williams and I was so mad when ABC cancelled Ugly Betty. I hope they make real use of her talent and that she doesn't just get a background role like Alfre Woodard did when she was on the show.

And I've also heard rumors that Brian Austin Greene is joining the cast. I don't know if it is true but he is hot hot hot!


2. My Generation

Now that I'm 7 years removed from high school I often find myself thinking about how different my life is now from what my 17 year old mind imagined it would be. My Generation (ABC) will follow the lives of former classmates 10 years after high school. The previews have looked pretty entertaining but I'm still not sure whether this will be as good as I think it will be. I can't wait to check it out.

3. Blue Bloods

I miss the days of really good cop dramas. Since distributors refuse to release NYPD Blue on DVD, I guess I'll have to hope that a new cop show can help me fill the void. This CBS show, starring Donny Wahlberg and Tom Selleck, follows the lives of a family of NY cops . I think this is the show I am anticipating the most.

4. Outlaw


This NBC show starring Jimmy Smits is about a Supreme Court judge who leaves the bench to return to private practice so he can fix the system he believes to be broken. It's been a long time since there was a good legal drama on TV (yes I liked Boston Legal but that was more of a comedy). Plus the show is produced by the same guy who made Alias which I really liked.


5. Law and Order-Los Angeles

Ok I know what you are thinking-how many Law and Orders is NBC going to make? I was thinking the same thing. But I think LA will provide a new twist to the show and with all the craziness going on in CA these days they will have plenty of stories to use for "inspiration". I'm not quite sure how I feel about Terrance Howard joining the cast though. I guess we'll have to wait and see...

6. Undercovers

This NBC show starring Boris Kodjoe and British new comer Gugu Mbatha-Raw looks to be a twist on Brad and Angie's Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Kodjoe and Mbatha-Raw play married spies that work together and from the previews that is all I can really figure out. The truth is, the reason why I am so excited about this show is because it features two black actors in the lead roles. When is the last time that happened on a major network? Plus it is from producer J.J. Abrams (Lost and Alias). Let's hope it lives up to its potential.

N.Y.C. Luxury Lime Creme Polish Review

Now that I've discovered N.Y.C. polishes I can't seem to stop buying them. When O.P.I. came out with the Shrek Forever After collection I wanted to try the Who the Shrek Are You? color but I have never in my life worn green nail polish and I was nervous about how it would look on me ($8.00 is a lot to spend on a polish you will only wear once). I brought this N.Y.C. color (again only 97 cents) to test the green color and I actually like the way it looks. The O.P.I. color is a lot different. It is lighter and more opaque but now that I know I can pull off a green color I may give it a try.

Just like with all my other N.Y.C. polishes I had to apply quite a few coats. The picture above is four coats with a top coat. The first coat was so sheer I could barely see it. But again, for 97 cents I think it looks pretty good.