Odd Girl Out?

This is slightly different than the type of posts I usually do but I really wanted to write this because this issue has been bugging me for a while now. Have any of you ever experienced being the odd man out? For me, I feel like it happens all the time. I have a very small group of friends 1) because I really don't trust a lot of people and 2) I think that true friendships are rare and most people I "hang out" with I don't really consider my friends. Well anyway, the people I do consider my "friends" leave me out of just about everything. They are always going out with each other and never inviting me. When I talk, they cut me off or change the topic as if what I have to say isn't important. One of them even stood me up on my birthday because the rain was giving her a headache. She then called me that same night and kept me on the phone for over 2 hours so she could talk to me about a guy she likes. So much for being sick. It was so frustrating!

I have been blessed with a twin sister and it's really nice to have someone that you can always depend on. However we now live in two different states so we can't be as much a part of each others lives as we want. So I feel kind of forced to put some effort into finding and maintaining some really good friendships.

A part of me sometimes wonders if my feelings are a bit irrational. Of course things can't be about me all the time, or even most of the time. But shouldn't they be every once in a while? It's just difficult to always be the one that everyone calls when they have a bad day, or when they need notes from class, or when they want to talk about their relationships, etc. But when I have a problem, none of them are ever available. I don't think a single one of them has ever even asked me how I am doing, but that of course would take the spotlight off of them and their problems.

What do you guys think? Am I being a bit irrational? I really do love them, it's just hard to always be the one who has to give but never receives...